What is Empowered Communication?

Let's get honest, many of us fear being assertive or having that dreaded courageous conversation.  Many of us would either prefer to stick our head in the sand, hoping that a difficult situation will naturally sort itself out or, rather than taking any empowered action, we prefer point the finger at other people, blaming them for the situation we find ourselves in.  
As a result, many situations continue to fester away and nothing improves. We stay dis-empowered and resentful.  
In this article on 'How to Empower your staff' today, I will share with you 3 of my top tips for holding an empowered, courageous conversation: 

• Recognizing communication filters  
  

We are all different with different beliefs, values and expectations. As a result, whenever you communicate with anyone, the message you are trying to convey firstly goes through your own filters, and then the filters of the person you are communicating with. A little self awareness can go a long way in helping you decipher your own filters when communicating to others. As a secondary point, also recognise that even though you may try your hardest to try and get someone to understand you - it all depends on their own personal beliefs and filters and they just may not be able to 'tune' into you. Not today anyway!  

• Owning your Hot Buttons!  
  

What makes you flip your switch or causes an amygdala hijack? Do you believe someone is deliberately out to get you or has intentionally gone out of their way to cause you trouble? Before you have a courageous conversation, it may be useful to work out why you have such a strong reaction to them. The truth is that the way we react to other people, has more to do with our own beliefs and feelings, than what they have actually said about us. Are you being a mind reader? What evidence have you got really to support your thoughts?  

• Assertive vs. Aggressive and Passive  
  

Assertive, calm and firm communication is preferred. This style of empowered communication also sends a strong message out that you care about yourself and you want to be heard. To be assertive, practice in front of the mirror and practice speaking up calmly and being clear on what you want. 'I feel' statements are good.  
 
Lisa Phillips is a communication, confidence and empowerment expert based in Australia. To find out more about Lisa speaking at your event, running a workshop for your team or confidence coaching, please see either www.howtoempoweryourstaff.com or wwww.amazingcoaching.com.au.