Most of us would like to build up our confidence muscle just a little bit more but have you ever considered what actually stops you from feeling like a confident person or stepping into the real empowered and confident you? In this third clip of Life and Confidence Coach Lisa Phillips appearing on The Love Destination, http://www.thelovedestination.com/shows/, Lisa shares her expertise on ‘What is Stopping You from Feeling Confident’.
This video includes information on:
1) The Fears that can keep you stuck
2) Our Negative Beliefs
3 ) How our negative beliefs and programming are like old SPAM
Watch the video here.
Who is Lisa Phillips?
Lisa Phillips is the author of ‘The Confidence Coach’ (Exile 2015) www.theconfidencecoachbook.com. She founded www.amazingcoaching.com.au over 15 years ago after a successful career in finance, training and engagement. Lisa regularly runs workshops for organisations and is a popular public speaker. For more information please seewww.amazingcoaching.com.au and www.howtoempoweryourstaff.com
Public Speaking is a passion of mine, and I am excited to be one of the Sydney Keynote speakers at the up and coming 'True Employee Engagement' Conference in Sydney.
My keynote speech at this conference is 'The Importance of Engaging Yourself prior to Engaging Your Staff' and I am excited to share this with my audience of HR Managers and other Managers who are interested in getting the best from their team.
I won't give too much away as to the contents of my keynote speech, but wanted to share with you a few thoughts to ponder.
For me, if you want to inspire a high performing, engaged and happy team, you need to be an empowered and happy manager. This isn't about putting on a mask and pretending to your staff that 'all is well' in the hope that they will believe you - it is about learning to tune into your own career and making sure you are 'tuned in', tapped in and turned on' before expecting anyone else around you to do the same.
At the end of the day 'Like attracts Like' and if you don't enjoy your job or couldn't care less about your own happiness at work, why should you expect your team to be engaged and empowered?
The truth is, an engaged and happy team start with you.
Let's get honest, many of us fear being assertive or having that dreaded courageous conversation. Many of us would either prefer to stick our head in the sand, hoping that a difficult situation will naturally sort itself out or, rather than taking any empowered action, we prefer point the finger at other people, blaming them for the situation we find ourselves in.
As a result, many situations continue to fester away and nothing improves. We stay dis-empowered and resentful.
In this article on 'How to Empower your staff' today, I will share with you 3 of my top tips for holding an empowered, courageous conversation:
Lisa Phillips is a communication, confidence and empowerment expert based in Australia. To find out more about Lisa speaking at your event, running a workshop for your team or confidence coaching, please see either www.howtoempoweryourstaff.com or wwww.amazingcoaching.com.au.
Have you ever given up on your New Year’s Resolutions or found yourself feeling fearsome of the goals you would like to achieve? In this second clip of Life and Confidence Coach Lisa Phillips appearing on The Love Destination,http://www.thelovedestination.com/shows/, Lisa shares her tips on how to How to Achieve Goals with Confidence.
Lisa’s Tips include:
1) The importance of flowing downstream to your desire
2) Your goals need to feel good to you in order for you to achieve them
Watch the video here.
Who is Lisa Phillips?
Lisa Phillips is the author of ‘The Confidence Coach’ (Exile 2015) www.theconfidencecoachbook.com. She foundedwww.amazingcoaching.com.au over 15 years ago after a successful career in finance, training and engagement. Lisa regularly runs workshops for organisations and is a popular public speaker. For more information please seewww.amazingcoaching.com.au and www.howtoempoweryourstaff.com
A blog by Lisa Phillips, Professional Speaker and Confidence Coach
Several months ago, I realised something very strange was going on with my body!
It started with a numbness feeling in my right arm, and after a week or so, the numbness had spread all the way up my arm, into my shoulder and on the right side of my face. Not being a big fan of running to the doctor, I decided to wait a few days to see if it would improve.
Unfortunately, things took a turn for the worse when after a few more days I was unable to even pick up a mug with my right hand and seemed unable to co-ordinate even the most simple task such as dialling a number on my phone or making myself something to eat. Fortunately, I am left handed so I was able to manage – albeit a little slower than usual.
As a result, I went to visit my GP who sent me off for several MRI’s and other medical tests to find out what was going on with my body.
I need to be honest here, I am not a 100% fan of medical diagnosis. For me, dis-ease in the body is often caused by an old way of thinking or resistant thoughts. As a result, I also believe in taking the time to listen and tune into my body to find out what is really going on with any illness.
To cut a long story short, my doctor informed me that I had the start of Multiple Sclerosis and referred me to a specialist at my local hospital.
However, even as he spoke those words to me, my body didn’t seem to agree with his opinion so later than afternoon, I sat down to meditate in hope of receiving guidance on what my body was trying to tell me.
Looking back, this all happened at a time I was feeling rather disconnected with Life. Certain parts of my career were sucking my energy dry leaving me feeling disconnected on a daily basis. Being someone who usually jumps out of bed excited about my day, I had chosen to put my head in the sand and tolerate a few jobs which may have brought me extra cash, but they actually ended up getting on my nerves and importantly did not align with vision of myself. Therefore, it is really no surprise that my body was trying to get my attention by causing a disconnect with the nerves in my body!
Three months since that diagnosis, I feel fantastic. Gone are the things that drain me of my joy and leave me feeling disconnected. It was a little scary letting go of some of these things but interestingly a lot easier when you know your health is on the line! More importantly, my connection with myself has increased tenfold and my vibration has never felt higher and it is increasing each day. Every day when I wake, my priority is feeling good rather than getting things done.
Each day I mindfully take the time to make choices which will enhance my wellbeing, rather than take away my wellbeing. I now sleep longer, take longer over my morning walk and turn down opportunities that don’t feel are aligned with my vision of me.
My hand has now regained 80% of its former use and some days I don’t even notice it. To be honest, I am really grateful for this diagnosis as it made me look at my life and make some important changes.
I remember listening to Abraham Hicks at a workshop when he said ‘If a tooth would fall out of your head every time you didn’t feel good, you would be more likely to do something about it’.
Isn’t that the case? How many of us just put up with stuff even though it doesn’t feel good? How many of us don’t take the time to care about how we feel or to do what we need to do in order to feel better?
In addition, when we are unwell, what do we focus on? Most of us keep our attention and focus on ‘being unwell’ which just creates more ‘being unwell’. Therefore if you want to be healthy, start to focus on health rather than sickness.
To conclude, this is the most wondrous experience I ever have. I delight each day that my hand improves that I am healing from within and in doing so, am becoming closer and closer to who I really am. Most of all I delight in the joy I feel each day, excited about my life unfolding as I am now keeping up with my own vision of me.
Lisa Phillips is a Life and Confidence Coach based in Sydney. She is also a professional speaker and author of ‘The Confidence Coach’ (Exile 2015). To find out more, please see www.amazingcoaching.com.au or www.howtoempoweryourstaff.com.
Today we are going to talk about the importance of personal boundaries and how you may feel if you allow someone to over step or walk all over your boundaries. You need to set clear boundaries in all areas of your life, be it in your career, relationships, with work colleagues or family members.
Setting good boundaries is healthy and Empowering
Have you ever walked away from a person, event or situation and felt resentful or violated? If some of your experiences are making you uncomfortable, then it may be time to set some personal boundaries. Setting good boundaries is healthy. It is not rude, bad or wrong. Let me repeat that….. it is not bad or rude to set boundaries! Unfortunately, many people believe that they should not speak up or set boundaries just in case it hurts another's feelings.
However, if we don’t have good boundaries in place we will end up feeling resentful and upset. Not speaking up gives out the message that the emotional wellbeing of the person who has hurt you is more important that your own emotional wellbeing. The result is that you are happy to protect another person’s feeling – but not your own.
The Good Boundaries
Good boundaries prevent you from being hurt and allow you to feel safe in your environment. They also assist others in knowing where they stand with you and let others know what you want and what you don’t want. A boundary is a limit that defines you as being separate from another person.
So when it comes to how people treat us emotionally, we will all have limits on what we find safe and acceptable.
Here are some examples of weak emotional boundaries:
An important point to note
When you allow someone to treat you in an upsetting way, the other person will not learn that this is not acceptable behaviour. Protecting yourself and setting healthy boundaries is necessary for both parties.
Once you learn to educate others on what you do or do not find acceptable behaviour towards you, you will notice that some will comply easily with the request – some may however continue to treat you badly. Try a few of these statements to help you get the message across:
Practice makes perfect and good boundaries require constant maintenance but they will improve the quality of your life!
Lisa Phillips is a Professional Speaker, Author and Life and Confidence Coach based in Sydney, Australia. Lisa features regularly in the media and has her own life coaching radio show. Lisa regularly speaks at conferences, and runs workshops for teams, wellness days and staff development days. To find out more, please see www.amazingcoaching.com.au or www.howtoempoweryourstaff.com.au
I am an introvert. I know, pretty hard to believe when I regularly speak in front of large audiences and appear on TV but it is true!
When working with my amazing clients, whether it is running a wellness workshop, speaking at a conference or working one on one with clients, I often hear them getting annoyed with themselves wishing they could be more outgoing or feel more comfortable or relaxed in social situations.
The first question I always ask them is Why?
If their answer is based around their own self development and they feel it is something that they truly want to do, then that is fine and we happily work together to achieve this outcome.
However, the response I often receive is that they feel they ‘should’ behave in this way. For example, they feel they should feel comfortable in large crowds or feel they should be more outspoken. Often this is due to societies beliefs that you need to be an extrovert in order to succeed in life.
But let’s get honest here – why should you force yourself to do something that isn’t going to feel good? What if actually being an introvert is more of who you really are?
Contrary to popular opinion, introverts are not necessarily shy or anti-social. The truth is that they just recharge their energy by being alone and prefer environments which are not too stimulating.
Conversely, extroverts need to be around other people to recharge their energy.
Research shows that over a third of the population is introverted. Despite this, we have a society filled with introverts forcing themselves to be extroverts in order to fit in.
If you are an introvert, why would you want to keep putting yourself in an overly stimulating situation? Also, if you are an extrovert, why would you feel like you should spend more time alone?
If this resonates with you – why not just accept the fact and accept that being an introvert (or extrovert) is who you really are and honour this authentic part of you?
Lisa (a true introvert who loves it!)
Lisa Phillips is a Sydney Professional Speaker and Confidence Coach based in Sydney. Lisa features regularly in the media and is a popular speaker on the topics of empowerment and confidence. For more information, please see www.amazingcoaching.com.au or www.howtoempoweryourstaff.com.au
For the next 7 weeks, we will be sharing a different video clip from Confidence Coach Lisa Phillips appearing on The Love Destination Expert TV Series. http://www.thelovedestination.com/shows/
The Love Destination is a new online expert series all about inspiration, empowerment and love. It is an online portal for entertainment, TV Shows, experts and resources on a wide area of topics including love, life, confidence, dating and relationships.
Confidence Coach Lisa Phillips is delighted to share 7 of her videos from ‘The Love Destination’ on a range of topics such as confidence, resilience and the importance of looking after you own wellbeing.
The first video this week is on the topic of ‘Tips to Boost Confidence in any Area of your Life’.
In this video clip, Lisa shares her top 5 confidence tips including:
1) Why Confidence is different for everyone
2) The importance of Caring about how you feel
3) Learning to Praise Yourself
Watch the first video in the series here.
Are you the tragic victim or damsel in distress in your life’s tale, waiting for the white knight that may never come, or are you the heroine who will save herself?
We all have a story about our life. For many of us, it is our very own personal pity story that we have been telling other people for years – often even decades! Usually the story contains a long list about why your life doesn’t work, what happened to you in the past and who is to blame for our life failing to turn out how you expected. Our stories can cover our career, relationship, finances or any other area of our life.
Stories often sound like this:
‘It is my partners/mothers/bosses fault I am not happy. They stop me from doing what I want to and I just never feel confident or assertive around them. It's no wonder I haven’t got any confidence.’
'That is my families fault. They always put me down and never approve of what I am doing. Nobody ever encourages me or listens to what I have to say.’
'Nobody pays any attention to me so there is no point in asking for any changes'
Many of us have gotten so fond of telling this story that we live our life according to it. We make excuses and blame the past. We get so fond of our story that we tell it to everyone we meet. We often use this ‘story’ as a justification for being the person we are today and it becomes our excuse for not moving forward and taking action.
Your story is NOT your friend.
You probably don’t want to hear this but your story is not your best friend. It’s just a smelly old security blanket that you have been clinging onto for TOO LONG!
Basically you have handed over your power to your story and stopped taking responsibility for yourself as an adult.
Why should I let go of my story?
When we keep repeating the story of what happened to us in the past we are actually keeping that situation alive. Each time we focus our energy on it, we are just re-creating it. We need to move on and quit carrying this story around like a badge. It’s just old baggage.
Most of our stories still have negative energy or emotions attached to them so in doing this exercise below, we will begin to release any negative energy tied to the story which may be holding you back or keeping you stuck.
So, pick up a pen and some paper and let’s get started:
1) Take at least 30 minutes to write down your story. All of it. Every little juicy
detail that you have been telling yourself for years. Don’t miss anything
out; it’s your story so you should know it inside out.
2) For the next ten days, I want you to look in the mirror every day and tell
your story to yourself at least twice day. Now this shouldn’t be that
difficult as you must have told it hundreds of times to others in the past!
3) Re-write your story on how you now want your life to be.
Lisa Phillips is a Professional Speaker, workshop facilitator and Life and Confidence Coach based in Sydney. She is the author of ‘The Confidence Coach’ and a regular speaker and facilitator on topics such as Employee engagement and confidence. To find out more, please see www.howtoempoweryourstaff.com.au or www.amazingcoaching.com.au
Lisa appears regularly in the Media, on TV, Radio and Print.